Battleship
PG-13
Entertainment: +2
Acceptability: +2

Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Akarsgard, Rihanna, Liam Neeson, Brooklyn Decker. Sci-fi action. Directed by Peter Berg.

FILM SYNOPSIS: The classic Battleship board game moves to the big screen in this at-sea adventure about defending planet Earth from a mysterious enemy fleet. At the center of the action is a pair of naval officer brothers and their commanding superior.

PREVIEW REVIEW: After all the other battleships are made useless, our hero (played by Taylor Kitsch with the same frown and vocal delivery as Star Trekís Chris Pine) uses the USS Missouri, which is now retired and a tourist site. With the aid of a handful of retired sailors, he and the remainder of his crew overhaul the ship and do battle with the invaders. Besides the implausibility of a ďhandfulĒ of retired navy men being able to get this ship into fighting condition within a few hours, I kept wondering where they got the live ammo? Do they have live ammunition on a tourist attraction? This is just one of the silly loopholes you could sail a battleship through.

So many things go unexplained, such as why an alien allows a goofy scientist to sneak inside the alien hub and steal secret info that will lead to their destruction. And lastly, how and why did Taylor Kitsch get this gig? Couldnít they get the more charismatic Chris Pine?

Itís based on a Hasbro board game and Universal made a boatload of money with it overseas, despite overall bad reviews. Itís loud and intense, with the whole navy up against superior beings from another planet. We already have one of those in movie theaters and most would argue that Marvelís Avengers is a better movie.

Despite the scriptís weaknesses, the cornball dialogue and the poor acting, I have to admit, I enjoyed it. Itís a popcorn eating, escapist movie that has one main positive Ė a salute to our military. These men and women are courageous and self-sacrificing. Those extra terrestrials donít know who theyíre messing with Ė the United States Navy! (I know, thatís a corny line, but it should give you an idea of the dialogue youíll be hearing if you attend Battleship.)

Preview Reviewer: Phil Boatwright
Distributor: Universal

Summary
Crude Language: None
Obscene Language: Around 10 obscenities, mostly the s-word.
Profanity: One use of Godís name followed by a curse.
Violence: A lot of things get blown up and most everything else gets destroyed by these demons from space; though the action is intense, it stays within the PG-13 range, avoiding gore. The blood consists mainly of scratches to the forehead; we are spared gory body parts being ripped apart.
Sexual Intercourse: None
Nudity: None
Homosexual Conduct: None
Sexually Suggestive Action/Dialog: None
Drug Abuse: Brief drinking.
Other: None
Running Time: 131 minutes
Intended Audience: Action junkies.

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